Once Upon A December
by IamTheAlleyCat
Summary: AH/AU Bella's last words to her mother were "I hate you". Three years later, still struggling with guilt, she tries to drown her sorrow in a one-night stand with a stranger whose name she doesn't know. Loads of fluff. The Sunflower Awards nominee.
1. Stranger

**A/N: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight. I only own the story in front of you.**

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**Chapter 1 – Stranger **

"Mom, I'm going out with Catharine and Melanie tonight."

"Where are you going?" My mom watched me carefully for my reply. I knew what she was doing — she was checking to see if I would lie to her. It made me so angry.

"Melanie is having a party at her home and she invited both me and Catharine to come. Don't look at me like that, I'm not lying to you!" I yelled. I was tired of it. Ever since I turned eighteen on September, my mother became like a hawk watching over me. All I had to do was mention a guy's name and she would immediately begin to suspect that I was sleeping with him. If I mentioned a party — she would give me a lecture about underage drinking. And worst of all — she always thought I was lying to her.

"Don't you dare raise your voice at me, young lady!"

"Then stop thinking I'm lying to you all the time! I'm not YOU! I am ME!" I shouted. Just because my mother married right out of high school and had me a year later, did not mean that I was about to follow in her footsteps.

"I'm doing my best to make sure that you won't become me!" My mother raised her voice.

"Leave the girl alone, Rene. You know she's smart enough not to repeat your mistakes, honey." Phil — my stepfather — tried to calm her down.

"Phil, stay out of it!"

Phil looked at me apologetically and shrugged, as if saying 'Sorry, I tried'. I gave him a weak smile. It wasn't his fault that my mother was paranoid. I didn't get it though. I _never_ got into trouble. I was a straight A student at school, my GPA was four point oh, both Catharine and Melanie were my best friends since kinder garden and my mother knew both their parents', I've never even been kissed for crying out loud!

"Mom, please. It's only a party. You know everyone who's going."

"Fine." My mother huffed, "but be home at ten!"

"But mom, it's Saturday!"

"I don't care, Bella. You _will_ be home at ten _sharp_ AND NOT ONE MINUTE LATER!"

"I hate you!" I shouted and ran upstairs to my bedroom.

I was still mad at my mom when I got to the party. As soon as I walked through the door Melanie took me to the side. The girl always knew how to read my like an open book.

"You had a fight with your mom?" she asked, already knowing the answer would be 'yes'.

I nodded.

"You poor thing." She gave me a tight hug. "She'll come around."

"I hope so" I whispered, still hugging her. Melanie had the unfortunate luck of being present during one of my fights with Rene, and just like any other person in town — she knew all about how my erratic mother married her high school sweetheart at eighteen only to divorce him less than two years later and move to Phoenix. Although Rene always said that she didn't regret having me, I could never stop wondering if she really meant that. Maybe if she wouldn't have had me, she could have made it work with my dad Charlie.

My dad… that was another touchy subject in my home. He's the chief of police in a small town called Forks in the state of Washington. I used to visit him every summer until I was fourteen, when I finally put my foot down and refused to be stuck two months each summer away from all of my friends. For the past three summers, Charlie came to visit me for two weeks in August, here in Phoenix.

I loved my dad, and even though he wasn't a man of many words, especially when it came to the subject of emotions, I knew he loved me as well. I may have hated Forks and the weather there, but I liked having my dad around.

The house was empty when I got back home that night. Catharine's brother dropped me off so I wouldn't have to walk in the darkness. I didn't mind. Melanie's house was only a few block away from mine, but he insisted that he didn't want his sister's best friend to walk alone in the dark.

I didn't break curfew and my mother wasn't even home to see it. I huffed. _Suits her, she's always thinking about herself first._ I immediately regretted the thought. It wasn't true. Rene may have been a little scatterbrained, but she loved me. The only reason she fought with me was because she _was_ thinking about me. I was sorry that I yelled at her, I was never so angry in my life. _I can' believe I said that I hated her_.

The house was still empty when I fell asleep. _I'll talk to her tomorrow, I'll tell her that I love her, that I didn't mean what I said_.

I never got the chance.

~.~.~

**Three years later...**

"Bella? We're here" Alice's voice brought me back from my memories. I looked around me. We stopped in front of a house somewhere outside downtown Seattle.

"Ok," I said.

Alice was my roommate in college. She was dating Rose's twin brother — Jasper — since senior year in high school. They were the only two girls I allowed myself to get close to in recent years, but I never told them about that night, three years ago, on December.

Everyone in the small town of Forks knew that my mother died in an accident during my senior year in high school and that I moved in with my dad after that. It was the talk of the town during my first week here, but no one knew more than the dry facts.

I closed up after the accident. I didn't speak unless it was absolutely necessary, and even then kept my answers short. Alice befriended me on my first day of school. She didn't let my quiet behavior deter her and eventually, she became my closest friend. She was the only reason I wasn't completely alone during my last months of high school. I met Rose only on graduation day. She and her brother Jasper came to be there for Alice, and Alice took the opportunity to introduce us.

When I went to college — Washington State in Seattle, I didn't want to get too far away from Charlie — Alice and I became roommates. We both studied journalism. Alice wanted to become a columnist in a famous fashion magazine and she said that she already knew her fashion, so she only needed to take care of the writing part. I studied the same, it wasn't my first choice, but they didn't have an English Lit program, so I went with Journalism.

Alice was a lifesaver. She kept me from sinking too seep into my depression after my mother died. She would insist that I come with her to parties and clubs, despite my lack of will to do so, but in the end, it did stop me from moping around the dorm on my own.

Rose was a bit intimidating at first, and I had a sense that she didn't really like me. However, as I got to know her better, and as she saw that I wasn't hanging around Alice because of her family's money — Alice was a Cullen, the richest family in Forks — Rose warmed up to me.

And yet, no matter how hard they tried, December was always a rough time for me. During my first two years in college, I would stay in the dorms during the holidays; Charlie was never much for tradition, and I couldn't stand so many people being festive while all I wanted to do was cry. So my dad would go to the Blacks for Christmas, and I would stay in Seattle.

This year, Alice said that she would not have any of it. I tried to resist but she played dirty. And by dirty I mean treating me to the most heartbroken expression I've ever seen on a person, one that made me feel as though I just told a six-year-old girl that Santa didn't exist while running over her puppy _and_ taking away her favorite candy. Yeah, it was _that_ bad! This is how I found myself all dressed up — courtesy of four hours of Barbie-Bella with Alice and Rose — going to a party across town where I knew no one, but the people I came with.

"Here," Rose shoved a bottle of beer in my hand.

I looked at her and raised my brow.

"Don't look at me like that! You're old enough, and it's a party!"

I gave her a weak smile. It wasn't her fault that I wanted to be back in my room, wearing my sweats instead of this ridiculous dress that was much too short, and drinking a cup of hot chocolate rather than a cold beer that I had no desire of drinking.

I didn't know whose house it was, only that it belonged to some relative of Alice's that was out of town for the weekend, _or maybe it was some friend of Alice's relative? Hell, I don't really care_.

After giving me the beer, Rose disappeared inside. I searched for Alice amongst the dozens of people in the house, but it was impossible to see her. I took a sip from the beer and made a face. It tasted like medicine, bitter and cold.

I made my way to the kitchen. It was just across the living room, so it wasn't hard to find. I placed my now-empty beer bottle on the counter and watched the street from the window. It was too dark to see much, just mountains of white covering every flat surface. It never snowed in Phoenix. Not even in the middle of the winter. Not even on _that_ night. I didn't want to think about it. I didn't want to remember, but the words kept playing in my head. The last words I ever said to my mother were "I hate you," and at the time I said it, I meant every word. I took another beer bottle from the countertop and downed it in several gulps, not caring about the taste anymore. I was never drunk before, but it seemed like a good escape at the moment.

I didn't even know I was crying until someone touched my shoulder and asked in a soft velvet voice, "Are you all right?"

I turned my head to look at the person talking to me and realized that I couldn't make out the shape of his face. I quickly wiped away my tears and murmured, "Yes, I'm fine."

"Here, looks like you could use it."

A small shot glass was pushed inside my hands. It contained a clear liquid, which — considering the size of the glass — was probably vodka, not water.

I drank it in one gulp, throwing my head back. I cringed as my throat suddenly burst into flames and tears came to my eyes once again.

The man chuckled.

It was such a seductive sound that I felt my insides twist inside me. It was an odd sensation, one that I've never felt.

I looked at the man, seeing him clearly for the first time. He had the most amazing green eyes I had ever seen. They were so deep and rich in color that I felt I could look in them and never find all the secrets they held. He was smiling, but it wasn't a full smile with teeth showing. It was just a slight curve of his lips, a crooked smile that should belong in the bedroom. _Now where did THAT come from?_

"Feel like talking about it?" he asked, tilting his head slightly. I was momentarily distracted by the color playing on his hair. It was a strange shade of reddish-brown, and under the bright light of the kitchen, it looked like there were another dozen of undertones to his hair. I felt a sudden urge to touch him, to see if his hair was as silky smooth as it seemed to be.

"Not really," I replied and looked down, watching my fingers playing with one of the fringes of my dress.

"Ok," he said.

I looked up at him again, unable to resist the desire to see his face again.

"How about we talk about something else, then?" he suggested.

I was mesmerized by the movement of his lips. They were uneven in thickness; the bottom lip was a bit fuller. They were also a bit moist, as if he just licked them with his tongue. His jaw was square and a bit angled. He was shaved clean, and when I took a deep breath, I swear I could smell his after-shave.

Slowly, his lips came closer to me. I looked up to see that his eyes were a darker shade of green. He was leaning towards me, very slowly, giving me every chance I wanted to stop him. I didn't dare to move. His lips were barely an inch away from mine when he paused altogether and looked me in the eyes. He was asking for permission.

I closed the distance between us, and my eyes flattered shut. His lips felt divine; both soft and firm at the same time. I tasted alcohol and something salty on his lips, but as he parted them and I tasted his breath, I forgot everything else. There was something very captivating about his taste. More intoxicating than alcohol, sweeter than the richest chocolate, his taste was all male.

I lost myself. I didn't know where I was anymore. I didn't remember what time of day it was. I only knew that I was being kissed for the very first time in my life, and it was better than anything I had ever imagined it to be.

He pulled me into his embrace, and I felt warm. His arms were strong, but tender around my body. His fingers lacing into my hair, pulling me closer, deeper into the kiss.

"You taste so good." His voice was husky.

My answer was in the form of a moan as he sucked on my bottom lip. I couldn't think about anything other than this man; his body pressed into mine, his chest and shoulders wide, his mouth glued to my lips. I drowned, and I didn't want to come up.

My fingers curled on his back, digging my fingernails into his muscles. He didn't seem to mind. His lips left mine, and he made a trail of kisses on my jaw line and over to my neck.

"Oh my god, that feels so good," I whispered when he nibbled on my earlobe, sending jolts of pleasure straight into the core of my body.

"I'm glad you like it, baby," he murmured, nibbling down my neck, and I could hear the smile in his voice. "Now how about this…" he sucked on a piece of skin, just where my neck met my shoulder, and I felt my knees buckle.

I wrapped my hands around his neck, trying to keep myself from falling.

"I think you liked that as well," he teased, smiling at me.

I blushed, feeling the heat spreading over my cheeks and onto my shoulders.

"Beautiful," he murmured.

I watched his as his eyes followed the blush from my face to my shoulders and down to the chest. The dress I was wearing was strapless, sitting very low on my body, revealing so much more of my cleavage than I was used to.

He lowered his head to my chest, kissing the skin just above the dress. My head rolled back. The sensations were so strong. I didn't know myself anymore. Where was the shy Bella, the twenty one year old virgin who never had a boyfriend? I didn't know and didn't care.

His hand cupped my breast above the fabric of the dress. It was warm and strong. When he began massaging the soft flesh, I could no longer hold the moans from escaping my lips.

"We better find some place more private," he whispered, lifting his head and looking me in the eyes.

I nodded. Unable to form words. I would lose myself in this man tonight. I would not let myself think about the past. _For one night in my life, I will let myself drown my feelings and not think about anything else._

I never remembered how we made our way from the kitchen to his bedroom. Only fragmented images of walking through massive amounts of people, while being kissed thoroughly, remained in my mind. My next memory was of being put on a bed and feeling the weight of his body pressing down on me.

He lifted my leg and wrapped it around his hips, positioning his body closer to mine. I could feel his hardness through the layers of clothes we were both still wearing, and my body pressed upwards on its own accorded. The friction felt better than anything we did until then, so I did it again.

"Baby, you're killing me," he mumbled in a groan, his mouth sucking on that spot on my neck that made my knees buckle earlier.

"I need you." I almost growled.

"I'm here, baby." He smiled against my skin.

My eyes locked with his. I didn't know how fire could be green, but it was there in his eyes. Burning. His hands roamed my back in search of the zipper of my dress, and I lifted my back to help him open it.

"Your skin is so soft," he murmured, almost to himself, "so responsive…" he trailed off.

I felt myself blush once again as he pulled the dress down from me. I wore only a pair of barely-there, lace boy-shorts. They were the same hot pink color as the dress, and for the first time, I was glad Alice had insisted on buying matching lingerie with the dress.

His hands cupped my breasts, the long fingers of his hands massaging and tugging on the sensitive flesh. It was a thousand times better than feeling his hands through the barrier of fabric, and now I wanted more of his skin to be exposed. I _needed_ to feel more of his skin. I tugged on his shirt and he pulled it off in seconds. I think I gasped when I watched his chiseled chest revealed to me for the first time.

"You're beautiful," I whispered, only half-aware that the words left my mouth.

He was unbelievable, his body toned and lean, but most of all, he was _warm_. The cold existence that had been my share for the past three years was gone when he held me close.

He chuckled at my words, his lips once again wearing that crooked smile that sent my heartbeat into frenzy. "I think that should be my line."

I pulled his head back to my chest where he was before, demanding his touch on my body, unable to speak the words out loud. It seemed like he understood because he complied and wrapped his mouth around one of my nipples, making me scream in pleasure. My body was moving mindlessly, seeking more friction. I think I even left scratches on his back as I tried to get him closer to me.

My high-heeled shoes were lost somewhere on the floor, so with my bare feet I tried to push his jeans away from his body.

"You need to open the belt first." He smiled with a nipple between his lips. The sight was so erotic that I could do nothing more than whimper and press myself upwards in a silent request.

He stood up and I moaned in protest at the loss of contact. I watched, enchanted, as he took off his shoes, socks, and jeans. The small black briefs he was wearing were stretched over his erection. I sat up, unable to stay away anymore, and splayed my hands over his stomach, my fingertips brushing against the waistband of his underwear. I pushed my fingers under the fabric, slowly pushing it down his legs. I never took my eyes off of his face, watching his lips slightly part as he panted, his eyes following my hands' movements. He stepped out of the fabric as soon as it was around his ankles, but he made no move to push me back on the bed, instead he placed one hand under my chin, his thumb resting on my bottom lip.

He didn't speak, only looked into my eyes, his thumb gently tracing my lips.

Finally, I broke contact with his eyes to look at his body. The light hair that trailed down his chest ended in a very large erection. _He's so big_, I thought, slightly nervous. My hands were still on his thighs, and I brought them up, curious if he was just as soft _there_ as he was everywhere else.

"Oh my god, that feels so good," he whispered through clench teeth.

He threw his head back when my fingers closed around his manhood and moaned. He was surprisingly firm in my hand, even if much softer than the rest of his body. I caressed him, moving my fingers up to the tip, spreading the wetness there over the rest of him. His hips bucked, and the head of his hardness touched my cheek.

"Can I…?" I blushed feverishly, unable to complete the question.

"God…" He moaned.

I took that as a 'yes' and touched him with my tongue. He tasted differently _there_, slightly salty. I still held him in my hand when I opened my mouth and took the tip between my lips.

"So wet… and warm…" he mumbled, his hand moved to the back of my head.

He didn't push me, just rested his hand in my hair. I felt encouraged and tried to lower my head a bit, taking more of him. I didn't get far, just a little more than half of his length fit in my mouth. I experimented with several different angles, trying to see which one was more comfortable for me, which one I could take more of him. I no longer cared that there was a man attached at the other end, I was too engrossed with the taste and texture. So I was surprised when after a few moments he pulled away from me. I watched him with fear in my eyes. _Did I do something wrong?_

"No, just the opposite, you're doing something _very_ right."

Apparently, I said that out loud.

"Your mouth feels so good around me." He gently pushed me on my back, lowering himself on his knees between my legs. "I don't want this to end so soon," he whispered, his hands tugging the boy-shorts down my thighs. "I want to taste you before I cum."

I leaned on my elbows and watched him taking the last piece of clothing off, much like he watched me earlier.

"And I want to be inside you when I do that." He smirked and my breath hitched.

"So soft…" he whispered. His were hands placed on my inner thighs, spreading me wider for him. I felt a wave of shyness and tried to stop him when he whispered, "No, don't hide yourself. You are absolutely beautiful. Every part of your body."

There was such intensity in his eyes that I forgot to be embarrassed by the fact that I was completely naked with an Adonis of a man between my legs.

I nodded for him to continue.

His fingers touched the folds of my core, followed by his tongue, and I heard a loud guttural growl that I didn't even know I could make. His tongue was much rougher in texture than his fingertips. The combination of the two — his tongue on the bundle of nerves at the top of my sex and his fingertips teasing the entrance — drove me crazy. I felt as if my entire body concentrated around his tongue and fingers. There was something building deep inside me, something that was getting stronger by the second. I was panting, and my elbows no longer strong enough to hold me up right.

"You're so tight," he whispered as he pushed one finger inside me and I moaned.

It took only two thrusts of his finger, and I was gone. I think I may have shouted as the waves of pleasure hit me, but I wasn't coherent enough to know for certain. I dug my fingers in the sheets beneath me while my back arched. I saw a rainbow of color explode around me before I landed back on the bed, barely able to breathe.

He gave a soft kiss over my sex before trailing a path of soft kisses upwards, through my breasts and to my lips. I didn't hesitate to open my lips under him mouth. His taste was mixed with mine. It was incredibly erotic to sense that. He pulled me further into the bed without breaking the kiss, and I felt him positioning his manhood between my legs, rubbing it on me to coat it with my moisture. I held on to his back very tightly when I felt him begin to penetrate me. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew that there will be pain, but all I could feel was being full for the first time in my life.

He slid deeper inside very slowly as if he knew that that was what I needed.

"That feels so good," I whimpered.

"_You_ feel so good," he answered with a growl.

I felt him pause when he came to my barrier. I saw the question in his eyes as he looked down at me, but looked away from his gaze. I leaned my head on his shoulder and pushed my hips up, pleading him with my body. There was a sharp pain when he completed the union, and I hissed and sunk my teeth into my bottom lip.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, staying absolutely still. "I'm sorry."

I shook my head. I wasn't sorry at all. The pain had already faded, and I needed him again. The now-familiar sensation of pleasure building inside me was back. I made very small movements with my hips, trapped under his weigh there wasn't much more I could do, but he understood. He pulled away and thrust back in. The friction was much like the one when his finger was inside me, only ten folds more powerful. I clung to him, wrapping my legs around his waist as he moved faster.

I kissed his shoulder and his neck as he moved us. "It feels so good," I whimpered. "You're so deep inside me."

"I love being inside you," he answered. "I love knowing that I am the first to give you such pleasure."

"Yes…"

I arched my back as the pleasure took over once again. Wave after wave of pure delight. I felt him stiffen and heard his guttural growl, and seconds later felt him pulse inside me, in his own release.

I must have fallen asleep — that or fainted — because when I opened my eyes again I was under the covers, lying on my side with my face pressed in his chest, his hand caressing me from shoulder to thigh. My leg was hitched over his waist, so he was able to cup my buttocks.

I listened to the steady rhythm of his heart, and I felt content and warm.

_I never want to move_.

"You don't have to."

I looked up to him. I guess I spoke my thoughts aloud yet again.

"Good," I murmured with what I was sure to be a lazy smile, a mirror of the one he had of his face.

We didn't speak for a while, just looking at each other. I was memorizing his face, every feature of it — from the straight line of his nose, to the curve of his brows over the green of his eyes. I had a feeling he was doing the same.

_Thank you_, was the last coherent thought I had before falling asleep. It was the first night in December that I didn't have nightmares.

**~.~.~**

I woke up early the next day, feeling oddly refreshed even though I couldn't have gotten more than four hours of sleep. I didn't dare taking a shower for fear that he might wake up. I got dressed as quickly as I could, brushing my fingers through the mess of my hair. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and was horrified. I looked ravished. My cheeks were scarlet red, my eyes wide with shock, my hair looked like a haystack, and I had a purple mark on my neck.

I touched it with shaking fingers. It didn't hurt, not now and not when he gave it to me. It was in the middle of the night. I was only half-awake when I felt his mouth on my neck and his body filling mine. I thought it was a pleasant dream, but the hickey suggested otherwise.

It was very early and still dark outside. I descended the stairs to the first floor where I could still see the aftermath of the party. There wasn't a single person left, and I thanked God for that. I made my way to the entrance closet and took my coat and purse. Only when I was out of the door I put on my heels.

I took out my cell phone. There were five missed calls — all from Alice's cell phone — and three messages.

_Bella, it's Alice, where did you go? Call me._

_Bella, Alice is looking all over for you. You ok? Rose._

_Bella, I'm staying at Jasper's. Call me as soon as you get the message. I'm worried sick about you! Alice._

I sighed. It wasn't fair to leave them hanging dry. I looked at the time. Five thirty four. _Too early to call, but I could send them a text._

I called a cab. It was freezing outside and I wasn't wearing much under my coat, no matter how warm it was. While I waited for it, I sent both girls a test message.

_Dozed off, sorry. Took a cab home. Bella._

The apartment was empty as expected. I took off the dress and hung it in my closet before going for a long shower. I felt sore in places I've never been sore before. It was only to be expected. But as I washed myself, more and more memories floated back. The touch of his hands, the taste of the skin behind his ear, the sounds he made when he was thrusting inside me… There was one thing I couldn't remember though. I searched my mind, going through the events of last night over and over again before the realization hit me.

_ I never asked his name_.

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**A/N: ****This is a little something I wrote during the weekend. I needed some good old fashioned fluff and it didn't fit the place I am with "When The Twilight Never Comes".  
**

**A link to a picture of Bella's dress in this chapter can be found on my profile page.**

**Thank you for reading,**

**Alley Cat.**


	2. Repercussions

**A/N: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight.  
**

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**Chapter 2 - Repercussions**

Alice gave me a few strange looks when she came back home. I made sure that I wore turtleneck sweaters to cover the hickey, but the way she would look at me made me feel as though she could guess what I did. She didn't bring up the subject though, thankfully, and I pretended that nothing changed.

"Are you sure you don't want to join us? Mom and Dad would love to have you, and you haven't met the rest of my family yet," Alice asked for the fourth time while she was packing.

She was going back to Forks for a family vacation. Jasper and her two brothers — whom I haven't met yet — were joining her and her parents to celebrate Christmas and New Year's.

I refused once again. I didn't feel like celebrating.

"Well … if you're sure about that …" She pouted, but she didn't use the full force of her signature 'Alice Pout' on me, so I was able to stand ground.

"Go, Alice. Have fun with your family. I'll see you in January."

"Take care, Bella. And promise me you won't spend the entire vacation moping around." She had a stern look on her face.

I laughed. It was so uncharacteristic for Alice to be stern that I just couldn't help myself.

"That's better."

She smiled and gave me one last hug before she and Jasper left.

I did my best not to "mope around," as Alice had put it, but I wasn't happy.

I wished there was a way I could have taken back the last three years and tell my mother I loved her one last time. Hold her and make sure she knew I didn't hate her. But I couldn't. She and Phil were driving back from a dinner they had together while I was at the party when a dog jumped in front of the car and Phil, trying to avoid hitting the dog, lost control over the car. The police said that they must have rolled over three times before the car landed on its roof. My mother died before the ambulance arrived and Phil passed away while on the operating table.

I never got a chance to say goodbye.

I used the time alone to do some catching up on my reading, cleaning the apartment and watching old movies. I felt oddly tired and out of energy. I also felt lonely. I missed having my best friend around, and I was very happy when she came back just before school started up again, smiling like a Cheshire's cat when she walked into the apartment. Jasper proposed on New Year's Eve.

Alice was busy with planning her wedding, so it wasn't surprising that it was all she talked about. I listened to her talking with her mother — Esme — over the phone, for hours. She tried to ask me about what type of paper she should chose for the wedding invitations — but I wasn't much of a help. I didn't even know that so many different types of paper even existed!

I was happy for her. I couldn't help but smile when she was absolutely radiant.

They decided on September thirtieth as their wedding date. It was enough time after graduation so that Alice will be free for any last minute changes. And knowing Alice — there will be plenty of those. But there were still a lot of planning to do.

Rose came over more often. She wasn't as helpless as I was when it came to all things wedding, and she was also the Maid of Honor. Alice was a bit apprehensive when she told me about it, but I assured her that I was absolutely fine with that. It was Jasper — Rose's only brother — who was getting married, so it was only appropriate that she would be the Maid of Honor in his wedding. It didn't mean, though, that I got out of wearing another too-tight dress. I was still a bride's maid, and as such, obligated to wear Alice's choice in a dress. Despite my general dislike of dresses, it was her day, and I was happy to do it for her.

On the last week of January, I caught a nasty case of stomach flu. I couldn't hold anything down without throwing up, and I was so drained that I could hardly make my way from my bed to the bathroom and back. When things didn't get better after two days, Alice had insisted that I go see a doctor.

"It's only stomach flu, Alice. I don't need a doctor," I tried to say, but my throat was hoarse and the words came out as a whisper.

"Yes, you do. And if you're not going to make an appointment I'm calling dad!" she threatened.

Carlisle Cullen, Alice's Father, was the town's doctor in Forks. . I was a klutz and that meant frequent visits to the ER, so I had the chance to meet him several times since I moved back to Forks. He was a very handsome man, fare and blue-eyed, and definitely a hit amongst the female population of Forks — married or not.

Alice had very little in common with her father other than her blue eyes. Her dark hair and petite figure was all her mother — Esme Cullen, a very charming woman who loved her family very much. I had the pleasure of staying over for more than one occasion during high school, and Esme always treated me as part of her family.

"There's no need," I whispered again. "I'll be fine tomorrow. Let me sleep."

"Fine," Alice huffed.

I closed my eyes and drifted back to sleep before she even made it out of my room.

~.~.~

The next day, when things didn't look any better, Alice did call her dad. I was too weak to argue.

"Bella, why haven't you been to the doctor's yet?" he asked while taking my blood pressure.

"I don't need a doctor. It's just flu," I murmured.

The scent of his cologne was making me feel sick, and I tried my best to hold my breakfast.

Carlisle — he insisted that I didn't call him Dr. Cullen since I was his daughter's best friend — took off the cuff once he was done and stared at me.

"What?" I asked after a few moments of staring.

"You're green."

"I know."

I moaned as another rush of nausea washed all over my body. I jumped out of bed, almost falling, and stumbled to the bathroom. The breakfast — eggs and toast — came right back up.

He waited for me when I came back to the room, sliding back under the covers. I closed my eyes and leaned back on the pillows.

"Bella. I need to ask you something."

I opened my eyes to look at him.

"When was your last menstrual cycle?"

I frowned and opened my mouth to answer when the realization hit me. My hand flew to my stomach while my mind was rushing through the dates. "The last week of November," I whispered.

He nodded, as if I was confirming something he already knew.

"You need to get an appointment with an OB/GYN," he said. "I suspect that you're almost two months pregnant."

"Pregnant," I mouthed.

"Yes. The sickness you're experiencing is an acute case of morning sickness. The doctor should be able to prescribe you with something to ease the nausea."

I was still silent. My head was spinning.

_I can't be — _

_What would Dad say? _

_I don't even know his name!_

I felt panic rise in me, and my breathing quickened.

"Bella, breathe," he told me. "It's not good for you or for your baby."

_Baby._

"Baby?" Alice was standing in the doorway. "Bella?"

I was too stunned to answer her. I knew Carlisle walked up to her and said something, but I wasn't listening. My hands cradled over my stomach, and my thoughts were miles away. He was the only man I had ever had sex with. I didn't even think about protection that night.

_Do I tell him? Can I even trace him? Should I trace him? Would he want to know?_

I couldn't think of an answer to those questions, but there was one question that I did have an answer to, one question that I didn't have any doubts about its answer. I couldn't even think about not keeping the baby. I wasn't eighteen like my mother. I was almost out of college, and I had enough money to support both my baby and myself.

I could go back to Forks. I didn't know how Charlie would react to the news, but I knew that I would be the town's gossip for a very long time. My eighteen-year-old self would have been horrified, but at the moment, there was something more important than me.

_My Baby._

~.~.~

"Ok, Bella, spill!" Alice ordered as soon as Carlisle was out of the door.

"What do —?"

"Don't play innocent with me!" she cut me off.

She was furious.

"Why are you so angry?" I asked, baffled.

"I was worried sick and you didn't have the guts to tell me that you were pregnant?" she yelled.

"I didn't know, Alice."

"How could you not know?" she frowned, calming down a bit.

"I just didn't think about it. It was only one time…" Actually, it was more than one time, but there was no need to go into the gory details.

"Wait. Who?"

"I don't know."

"What?" she screeched.

"Alice why are you shouting?" Rose asked, walking into the apartment. "The door was open." She explained when I looked at her. "So, why is she shouting?"

"Because Bella is — "

"Alice, don't —" I tried to stop her.

"— pregnant."

"Pregnant?" It was Rose's turn to screech.

"Yes," I said. "Now can you both stop shouting? I think there isn't a neighbor left who didn't hear you."

"Who's the father?" Rose stared at my stomach.

"I don't know," I repeated.

"How can you not know?" Rose was doubtful.

"I didn't ask his name."

They both gawked at me.

"Bella Swan the eternal virgin didn't even ask the guy's name before jumping in the sack with him?" Rose glared at me, shocked and somewhat amused.

"No," I mumbled.

"It was someone at that party, right? When you disappeared and came back in the morning?" Alice asked.

I nodded.

"I knew something happened!" she shouted.

"Spill!" Rose ordered.

With broken sentences, I explained how I met him at the kitchen, and how I just got carried away. I wasn't proud of myself, to say the least.

"You just left him?" Alice watched me, disbelief all over her face.

"Yes. I didn't know what else to do. I acted before I could think through."

"You have to find him," Rose stated.

"I don't know if I can," I said honestly. "I need to think things through before I even try and find him."

"Ok, it's you call. But we're here for you." Rose placed her hand over mine. "And for the baby." She smiled. There was tenderness in Rose's smile that I didn't see before.

"Thank you, Rose."

"I'm here for you as well, for the both of you." Alice placed her tiny hand over Rose's. "And I'll help you find your man once you're ready.

"We both will," Rose added.

I began to cry. "You are the best friends I could ever ask for."

~.~.~

The doctor confirmed what Carlisle had suspected. I was ten weeks pregnant.

Dr. Emilie Grace was very nice and informative. She prescribed me with some medicine to help me with the morning sickness. She said that they stared a bit late for me — most women begin having them around week six — but they should ease with the medication, as well as with eating smaller meals and drinking tea before getting up from bed in the morning. I also got my first ultrasound. I have to say I wasn't too impressed. It was a black and white mess as far as I could see. Dr. Grace said that the baby was about 8 mm long, and I said I'd take her word for it. She laughed.

During the next few days, I went online and got more information that I had ever wanted to know. By the time I got to reading about Braxton Hicks contractions, I was panicking. There was so much I needed to know, so much that was different. Foods I would need to avoid, activities and exercise I should and shouldn't do, symptoms I should expect, symptoms that I should call my doctor about —

"Bella, breathe." Alice pressed my shoulder with her tiny hand. I didn't even notice I was hyperventilating. "Maybe you should talk to Mom, she knows better than all these sites you're reading."

At first, I wanted to protest, but after giving it some thought, it made sense. Esme had two children of her own and one that was adopted, she knew everything about experiencing pregnancy, parenthood, and most importantly, she was a woman.

"Come home with me this weekend. She would love to see you, and you might relax a bit after talking to her," Alice suggested.

"Ok, you're right."

"I'm always right." Alice smirked. "Now go to bed. I'll see you in the morning."

"See you."

I had nightmares that night, but this was only to be expected after what I had been reading all day. I woke up several times that night, and in the morning, I was sick and tired. Literally.

Despite Alice's suggestion, I didn't get to visit the Cullens before March. I was busy with schoolwork, and Alice was busy planning the wedding. However, I did get a chance to talk to Esme over the phone, and had at least some of my fears put to rest.

My morning sicknesses had subsided with every day that passed and by the time I was in the middle of my fourteenth week of pregnancy, they were all but gone.

I didn't tell anyone yet. I had already a little bump — okay so it was more than a little bump — but it was still cold outside, which allowed me to wear loose sweater that hid my condition.

There was only one breakdown registered. It was last month when I tried to get dressed one morning and couldn't find a pair of pants that fit me. Even my stretch jeans no longer fit me.

"Alice!" I called through spilling tears.

It was Friday morning and Alice was still home when I got ready for my classes.

"Bella? What's wrong?" She stormed into my room and looked panicked as she took in my tearful appearance.

"They won't fit!" I bellowed.

"What won't fit?" She was completely confused.

"My pants! They won't close!" I burst into sobs.

Alice began to laugh. "Is that what you're crying about? That you don't fit in your pants?"

"Yes!" I sobbed. "Stop laughing at me."

I had to give her credit, she did her best to stifle her laughter, but it was to no avail. The giggles spilled from her as her shoulders shook, causing me to cry even harder.

"What's going on?" Jasper stood in the doorway, looking from my tearful face to Alice's shaking figure.

"Jasper… I'm fat!" I cried.

Alice burst into full-blown laughter, no longer trying to stifle.

"Bella, you're not fat." Jasper looked terrified. Men always were when it came to crying women. "Alice, why is she crying?"

Alice tried to explain between giggles, "She… the baby… pants… emotional…"

"The baby pants are emotional? What?"

Now I began to laugh. The expression on Japers face as he was trying to figure out whether his fiancée and her best friend had lost it was priceless. I slumped in the middle of my bed, holding my hands over my tummy, and laughed.

"Alice?" Jasper's voice was worried as he put his hands on Alice's arms, rubbing them slightly. "Care to share the joke with me?"

"Bella thinks she's too fat because the pants don't fit her anymore." Alice managed to get a full sentence out before starting to laugh again.

"Ok. I understand." Jasper obviously didn't understand, and I was barely breathing from laughter.

"Bella, breath," Alice reminded me once again. "It's not good for the baby."

"What baby?" Jasper's head whipped to Alice's face and then dropped down to her tummy. I laughed harder. "Alice, are you —?"

"No, silly, I'm not. Bella is."

"Bella?" He sounded doubtful.

"Yes, Bella, and stop looking at me like that."

"Bella?" he asked one more time.

"Bella." Alice assured him.

"Bella?" Jasper turned to me.

"You're like a broken record." I giggled. "It's too funny."

"Well, you know what that means, don't you?" Alice looked at me excitedly.

"What?" I stopped laughing. I didn't like the look she had on her face.

"Shopping!"

"Ugh!" I grumbled. My mood plummeting once again.

"Hey, you need new cloths, little mama."

"I guess, you're right." I was still grumbling.

"Today, after classes, I'm taking you shopping. Jasper will pick us up from school."

"Fine," I muttered.

I knew there was no point in arguing with her, especially when I knew she was right. I did need some new clothes.

Eventually, Alice found a pair of sweats in the back of my closet that were not too shaggy, and I wore them. After class, she took me shopping, with Jasper trailing along, and the crisis was over.

I called Charlie and told him I was coming over to Forks for the weekend. We talked once a week over the phone, but I haven't seen him since before December. I didn't want to tell him I was pregnant over the phone, but when he said that he wasn't going to be in Forks on the weekend — he was taking his new wife, Sue, to a weekend getaway — I decided that I didn't have much of a choice. It would take only one nosy townsman to look at me and see the truth, no matter how loose fitting my clothes were. He was shocked at first, disappointed a bit, and I had expected it. Finding out your only daughter was pregnant and alone at twenty one wasn't something he was hoping for. He said that he needed to think about it.

"You'll be all right on your own in the house?" he asked, concerned. "With the baby and everything?"

"I'll be staying with the Cullens, Dad." I smiled. Charlie may have been surprised, but he loved me not matter what. "That way I won't be alone."

"That's good. Well, have a great weekend, and I'll talk to you soon."

"Ok, Dad. Love you."

"Love you, Bells." He ended the call.

I still smiled when Alice walked in to the apartment ten minutes later.

"I told Charlie," I announced.

"And? How did he take it?"

"Better than I thought. He still needs to wrap his mind about things, and he's not too happy about the lack of father in the picture, but he's supportive."

"That's great. You know you can change it, though, about the father?" Alice asked gently.

We've had this conversation before, and every time, I said that I wanted to wait. My main motivation was the fear of a miscarriage. I'd read so many stories about women who lost their babies before the twelfth week that I was scared of telling anyone. It was a silly superstition, but Alice humored me. Now, that reason was no longer valid, and I really should make an effort to find him. He may not want to have anything to do with the baby or with me, but at least he had a right to know.

"I think you're right." I saw the surprise flash over her face, before she broke into a smile. "When we come back after this weekend, we'll try and find him." Honestly, I didn't have much hope. All I knew about him was his looks and nothing else — not his age, not his address, not even his name.

"I'll be there for you," Alice promised.

"I know. I love you, Alice."

"Love you too, Bella."

"Okay, before I start crying," I said, tears already pooling in my eyes, "let's get cracking with the packing."

I didn't have all that much to pack, just a few changes of clothes and my vitamins. Dr. Grace prescribed me with some prenatal vitamins after my second checkup at week ten. She also asked me if I wanted to know the sex of the baby. I said no. That was another superstition I found over the internet, and as much as I wanted to consider myself a reasonable person, I still followed through and requested that she didn't tell me. Dr. Grace laughed, but complied without question.

I talked to Esme frequently over the phone. She was a fountain of information, and I could ask her everything. Don't get me wrong, Dr. Grace was wonderful, but there were smaller questions that I didn't feel right bothering her with, and Esme was there for me. She was almost as excited as Alice when I told her about the baby.

"You know I think about you as a daughter, Bella," Esme said.

It was true. It was amazing how close we had gotten over the last three years. She was more motherly than my mother ever was, but she always said that she wasn't there to replace Renée, but to watch over for me while my mom wasn't able to. And it felt good.

~.~.~

The drive to Forks was long and tiresome. Jasper was driving Alice and me. Rose took her BMW and followed us. I drifted in and out of sleep during the ride, not really listening to the chatter between Alice and Jasper. I woke up as we passed the "Welcome to Forks" sign.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you, Bella. Edward is also coming this weekend," Alice announced from the front seat.

"Edward?" The name rang a bell but I couldn't place it.

"He's my second brother. Remember I told you about him?"

"The one who went to Juilliard? But I thought he was your cousin."

"He is. My parents adopted him when he was seven. His mother was my aunt."

I tried to remember Alice talking about this Edward. I knew she had two older brothers and that one of them was adopted, but I remembered more stories about Emmett than about her other brother. All I came up with was when she mentioned him once when I asked who's piano was standing in their living room and she said it was Edward's. I'd never met him in person. He was already away in college when I first arrived in Forks, and whenever I came for a visit, which wasn't that many times, he wasn't there.

"He's the one with the piano?" I asked to confirm my memories.

"The one and only," Alice chimed. "You'll finally be able to meet him."

"Alice!" I scolded. She was in full matchmaking mode now. "Do I need to remind you that I'm pregnant?"

"Humph! That doesn't mean you can't meet new people."

I just rolled my eyes.

_Alice will be Alice._

* * *

**A/N: Thank you for reading,**

**Alley Cat.**


	3. Edward

**A/N: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight.  
**

* * *

**Chapter 3 - Edward**

"Alice! Bella!" Emmet's booming voice greeted me as soon as I stepped out of the car.

"Hi Emmet." I smiled.

He was a gentle giant, but his hugs were always a bit tight.

"HI Emmet" Alice hugged her brother. "Be careful with Bella, Emmett," she told him when he was about to hug me.

"I'm always careful with her." He frowned. "Aren't I?" He looked at me.

"Yes, but…" I cradled my hands over my little bump. I saw his eyes widen in shock, and then a huge smile broke over his face.

"We're going to have a mini-Bella?" he asked.

"I don't know if it's a boy or a girl yet, but yes." I smiled.

You could trust Emmett to be excited. He was like the male version of Alice, only with a huge amount of muscles and another foot and a half in height.

"That's great!" he almost shouted.

His hug was much gentler than in previous occasions as he gave me a tight hug.

Another car arrived just then, it was Rose's BMW.

"Rosalie," Emmett greeted her, his eyes sparkle.

I knew he had a soft spot for Rose, but she seemed absolutely blind to his interest in her.

"Hi Emmet, how are you?" she asked, smiling lightly.

"I'm doing great."

"Are you going to stand there for long or are you going to come inside?" Esme asked from the front door, which was still open since Emmett didn't close it when he came outside.

"We're coming, mom," Alice answered, pulling Jasper in one hand and Emmett in the other.

"Mom, where is Edward?" She asked as soon as we were inside.

Jasper took their luggage to Alice's room and Emmett helped Rose with hers to one of the guest bedrooms.

"He's on his way, he'll be here in time for dinner," Esme said. "How are you feeling, Bella?"

"I'm actually a bit tired," I admitted.

It was something new; the fatigue I was experiencing the last few days. I would go for a nap after class, wake up for dinner, and then go right back to bed for a full nights' sleep.

"It's ok, sweetie." Esme smiled, reading the embarrassment in my face. "I was also tired all the time when I had Alice. You can go upstairs and take a nap before dinner. I'll wake you up in time."

"Thank you, Esme." I gave her a hug and went upstairs, taking my bag with me.

I changed into my pajamas and crawled under the heavy covers. Esme made sure to add another blanket to the room I'll be staying in after I told her how I always get cold these days.

I was asleep within seconds.

**~.~.~**

A soft voice was talking to me, bringing me back from my dreams. "Bella, it's time to wake up."

"I'll be right up, Alice. Just a few more minutes," I mumbled, not willing to wake up just yet.

"It's Esme, Bella, and it's time for dinner."

I opened one eye, blinking a few times before Esme's face came into focus. "Dinner?" I asked, still drowsy.

"Yes. You have about twenty minutes to take a shower and come down, sweetie."

I yawned widely and nodded. "I'll be right down."

"Good. See you downstairs." Esme smiled and left the room.

I dragged myself to the bathroom, but only fully woke up a few minutes later when the hot water was already running over my body. I took a quick shower, making sure not to wet my hair so that I would have less trouble with arranging it, and then went to get dressed. I wore a tight-fitting blue turtleneck, a thick white sweater over it, and a pair of maternity black pants. I couldn't fit into any of my jeans now.

I looked in the mirror, turning to one side and then to the other, checking to see if my bump was really as big as I thought it was.

The door opened and I saw Alice's head pop into the room.

"You look fine. Now come on downstairs. I want you to meet Edward."

I rolled my eyes, but stepped away from the mirror.

"Do I look pregnant?" I asked quietly, as we left the room and headed for the stairs, biting my lip. I didn't know this Edward, and this was kind of private.

"Well, just to anyone who knows you," Alice said after a critical look.

"You didn't tell Edward, did you?"

"No, of course not." Alice seemed almost hurt. "It's not for me to tell."

I sighed in relief.

We took the stairs one at a time. My sense of balance was never good, and with the extra weight I've put on, I felt even less confident in my step. I didn't look up until I was safely at the bottom. Everyone was in the living room, talking animatedly. I saw Carlisle and Esme sitting on the love seat and Jasper on the couch with Emmett and Rose. They were all talking to someone who sat with his back to us on an armchair.

There was something very familiar about the color of this person's hair. It was somewhere between reddish and brown, with many undertone. I felt my heart begin to race when Alice announced our arrival and walked over to sit on Jasper's lap. I stood frozen in my place, my eyes fixated on the hair that brought back so many memories.

"Bella, don't just stand there, come on over and meet Edward." Alice looked at me with a wondering expression.

The bronze-haired man, who was obviously Edward, got up and turned to face me. I found myself staring into a pair of deep-green eyes I haven't seen since December and everything went black.

**~.~.~**

I slowly regained consciousness. First, there was a mumble of voices and I couldn't understand anything of what was said, but then I could hear Carlisle's voice reassuring everyone that I was fine and just need some air. It took me a few seconds more to understand that I must have fainted and my first thought was my baby.

I gasped in panic, my eyes opening wide with fear.

"Bella, sweetie, take a deep breath. You are absolutely fine, Edward caught you before you hit the floor."

At the mention of his name, I began to hyperventilate even worse.

"Bella, calm down. You need to breathe," Carlisle said with a soft voice that was layered with authority.

It was his 'Dr. Cullen' voice, the one he used to get a patient to listen. But I couldn't. _He_ was here! I knew his name now and obviously he knew mine as well.

"Bella look at me," Carlisle demanded and I focused my eyes on the blue of his. "Take a deep breath," he order and I obeyed. "Good. And another one." I breathed again.

After a few more deep breathes, I was finally calming down, and Carlisle helped me to sit up. Emmett was the first one to approach me as soon as Carlisle stepped back.

"Bella-Boo?" He used his nickname for me and I couldn't help but smile. "You okay?"

I nodded. It was the first time that I noticed that his eyes were the same shade of green as Edward's. I looked up to see everyone staring at me and blushed. It was never comfortable to be the center of attention.

"Come to the table everyone," Esme said, sending a smile towards me. "I'm sure you're all hungry."

Emmett helped me to my feet and walked me to the dining room.

I both felt and saw Edward staring at me throughout all the meal. I couldn't taste a thing, even though I was sure that it was very good — Esme was a wonderful cook; I was simply too nervous to notice the flavor of the food.

_Did he guess? Did they tell him? Did he hate me now? Did he try and find me after that night? What will I say to him? _

_Can I avoid him?_ No, that was clearly impossible as we were both staying in the same house over the weekend.

Alice sent more than one questioning glance over to me, but luckily, she said nothing. I knew that she was going to catch me after dinner was over and grill me until she got the full story out.

Emmett was never known for his tact — mostly because he had none — and true to self he could no longer hold himself and as dessert was served he called me. "Hey, Bella, so is it safe to say that you think Edward here is drop-dead gorgeous?"

I blushed and stared down at my plate. If I weren't so embarrassed, I would probably have laughed — it was pretty funny.

I heard someone slap Emmett and him yelling, "Rose? What was that for?"

"That's for your big mouth," she answered him calmly.

"But I thought you liked my big mouth?" He pouted.

I looked up, staring at him and Rosalie.

_Did he just say what I think he said?_

"I do, but I prefer when you use it for things other than talking," she answered, unabashed.

_Holy shit! Did SHE just say THAT?_ _I guess Rose did notice Emmett's interest in her, I wonder when did THAT happen?_

"Oh, I know you do. I'd have to be deaf not to know that you like it when I —"

"Emmett!" Japer cut him off. "I do _not_ want to hear that."

"Neither do I," Carlisle added.

Everyone chuckled, and the atmosphere lightened again.

I had to cover a yawn when Esme offered everyone tea and coffee. "I think I'll have to decline, Esme." I said, barely stifling another yawn. "I'm too tired."

"But you slept all afternoon!" Emmett argued.

"She needs her sleep, bozo!" Rose chided him.

"Fine, sweetie. Have a good night." Esme smiled.

I got up from the table, said my goodbyes to everyone, doing my best to ignore Edward's eyes, and went upstairs again.

**~.~.~**

_I need to pee. _

_I don't want to get up. _

_But I need to pee._

_But I don't want to get up._

_But I really, really, REALLY, need to pee._

I kept arguing with myself half-asleep until my bladder won, and I dragged myself into the bathroom. I looked at the time on my way back to bed. It was six forty in the morning, way too early to be up and running. But as I lay under the covers for ten more minutes, I realized that I wasn't tired anymore.

_And I'm hungry_.

I got out of bed and went downstairs, not bothering to change from my thick pajamas. The house was quiet as everyone was still sleeping in their rooms. I made myself a bowl of cereal and a cup of hot chocolate before sitting at the kitchen table — which was much smaller than the table in the dining room — and digging in.

When I was done I rinsed the dishes and put them in the dishwasher. I realized that I left my vitamins in my room so I took a glass of water with me and went back up.

After taking my vitamins and changing out of my pajama, I took a book from my bag and a blanket from my bed and went back downstairs. I didn't want to wake anyone, so I didn't turn on the TV. Instead, I sat on the couch, wrapped myself in the blanket, and sank into the book.

I was halfway through the fifth chapter when I heard someone on the stairs. I assumed it was either Esme coming down to make breakfast, or Carlisle coming down for his morning coffee. It wasn't until a soft voice called my name that I looked up to see Edward standing over me.

"We need to talk."

_Oh, oh. Conversations that begin like that rarely mean anything good._

I put down my book, marking the page I was reading with my bookmark, and looked back at him. "Okay."

"Mind if I sit?"

I folded my legs beneath me and nodded. I waited for him to start.

"Why did you leave that morning?" he asked right out.

"I don't know. I guess I panicked," I said truthfully.

"You could have left a note, something. I didn't even know your name."

"Neither did I." I shrugged.

"I tried looking for you." He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes the way the smiles on that night did.

I blushed at the memory.

"You did?" I asked in a very quiet voice.

"Didn't help me that I didn't know your name or with whom you arrived," he admitted. "It was my roommate's party. James invited almost half of the campus, so he didn't know who I was talking about when I asked him."

"You could have asked Alice…"

"I didn't even know she was there."

"Oh."

"You could have looked for me too," he said, looking in my eyes. "I think you should have."

_How much does he know? How much did he guess?_

"I didn't think you'd want anything to do with me." I blushed again.

"I missed that," he whispered. "Your blush."

"Oh." I blushed even deeper, and he chuckled.

It was the same warm sound I treasured with me in the last three and a half months.

"So, tell me about yourself."

"What would you like to know?" _Didn't he talk to Alice and Rose last night?_

"I didn't know what you said to Alice and Rose about me, so I preferred not to ask them about you." He seemed to have read the question in my face. "Do you go to college in Seattle?"

"Yes, I study Journalism at Washington State, with Alice. She's my roommate," I volunteered.

"Yes, that much I figured out myself. She speaks about you often when I talk to her. I just never made the connection until I met you again last night."

"So… anything else?"

"I know it's a bit odd, but would you like to have lunch with me, today?"

"Like a date?"

"Yeah." He threaded his fingers through his hair and I could tell he was nervous. "Like a date." There was a slight red tint to his cheeks and I felt the urge to cry. He was too charming.

"I'd love to," I whispered, trying my best not to let the tears fall.

"Bella? Are you okay?" he asked, alarmed.

"Yes, don't mind me. I'm just a little emotional."

He smiled. A real smile this time. "Looks like every time we meet, you're in tears." He winked.

I laughed. "Yeah, it would look like that."

"Well, I'll leave you to your book." He stood up. "I don't want to bother you."

"It's okay, you're not bothering." I didn't want him to leave. It felt so good to have him near me. Maybe it was the hormones, but I felt a tug in my heart just at the thought of him leaving. "Don't leave," I begged.

"All right. So will you tell me a little more about yourself?"

I honestly didn't understand why he would be so interested in me, but he was a very good listener and I found myself telling him everything he wanted to know. I told him stories about my childhood vacations in Forks, about Charlie, about the numerous classes Rene tried to send me to, before giving up. I also told him about the last night I saw my mother alive.

"That was the reason I was crying that night," I whispered through tears. "It was the third year anniversary to their death." I looked down on my hands, folded in my lap. "I never got a chance to say goodbye to her. My last words to my mother were words of hate." I was sobbing now.

Edward held me as I cried, rubbing my back softly until I calmed down.

"Thank you," I murmured into his shirt, which was now soaked with my tears.

"You're welcome. And thank _you_, for telling me."

"There's one more thing I need to tell you." I began, gathering my courage.

He had a right to know. Before we went any further, I needed to tell him about my baby.

"You can tell me anything." He cradled my face with his hands, looking me straight in the eyes.

I couldn't speak, not when he was looking at me like that, with eyes full of emotions I couldn't decipher. So I took his hand and pulled it away from my face, placing it gently on my bump.

"What…" His brows furrowed. He looked down at his hand over my belly and back up to my face. "I don't…" And then his face lightened up with a different emotion. He looked down again, very gently running his hand over my stomach, and then up again, there was a question in his eyes.

I nodded, biting my lip nervously.

I saw a huge smile break over his face before he crashed his lips on mine.

I moaned at the contact. His kiss was gentler than the kisses he gave me before, but they were kisses I had missed for far too long. My heart leaped inside my chest as he deepened the kiss and his tongue found mine. He buried one hand in my hair and placed the other on the small of my back, pressing me closer to his body. He was holding me as if he feared I would disappear at any moment.

"I've missed this too," he whispered between kisses, "the taste of your lips," he sucked on my bottom lip and I whimpered. "The feeling of your skin against mine..." He caressed my face with his hand.

"I've missed you too," I murmured.

There wasn't much said after that. He devoured my mouth as if he was a dying man and I was his last meal. The blanket slid to the floor as I pulled him on top of me, leaning back to lie on the couch. He rested his weight on his hands while still pressing himself close enough for me to feel the effect I was having on his body.

"Yee-Ha! Go Eddie!" Emmett boomed behind us, and I almost jumped.

"Emmett, get lost!" Edward growled.

"Nah, I'm enjoying the show too much." Emmett grinned and I blushed, burying my face in Edward's shoulder as he pulled us back into a sitting position.

"Emmett, stop bugging them." I heard Rose's voice as she scolded him.

"Fine." I was sure Emmett was pouting again, but apparently it didn't work on Rose because I saw her dragging him into the kitchen while saying, "Give them some privacy, you peeping-tom."

"I'm sorry I threw myself at you like that," Edward said into my hair. My head was still nuzzled into the crook of his neck.

"I wasn't complaining." I smiled.

"It feels so good to have you in my arms," he said. "I don't understand it, but it feels right."

"I feel the same."

We sat like that, him holding me in a tight hug, for a while until everyone came downstairs. Carlisle and Esme gave us curious looks, and Alice seemed to beam the moment she saw us, but I didn't want to move. For the first time in much too long, I was happy.

Edward finally spoke when no one said anything, but everyone still stared. "I think we'd better tell them."

"Tell us what?" Emmett asked with his mouth full.

"Don't speak with your mouth full," Esme told him half-heartedly. She was obviously more interested in the recent development between Edward and me.

"It seems that you're going to be grandparents," Edward said.

"We already knew that, silly." Emmett was once again the one to speak.

I saw Rose and Alice rolling their eyes at him. Carlisle had a smile on his face, and he seemed proud. I didn't even have a chance to worry about his reaction — Edward was, after all, his son, even if an adopted one at that.

"Congratulations, son," was all he said.

"Thanks, Dad." Edward was also smiling.

"Will someone let me in on the secret?" Emmett pouted.

_I never thought he was this slow,_ I thought with a giggle.

"Pay attention, you idiot, Edward is the father of Bella's baby," Rose scolded Emmett, but her tone was much softer than her words. "I'm glad you found him, Bella."

"Me too."

"I'm going to make us all breakfast," Esme announced. "Leave Bella and Edward alone."

As everyone scattered around, Edward picked the blanket up from the floor and draped it over my shoulders. He wanted to know everything about the baby while we waited for breakfast to be ready. I told him about the first few weeks of morning sickness and about the ultrasound which didn't show much of anything. I was due to another scan in the next week, and as I told him that, he asked very quietly if he could come with me.

"Of course you can." I smiled. "It's your baby, too."

"My baby." He seemed enchanted with the term as he pressed his forehead to mine and repeated the words over and over again.

I laughed. "Yes, your baby." I took his hand and once again placed it over my tummy.

I learned that Edward was working on his first album after graduating from Juilliard. I asked him to play for me and after we had breakfast — I was hungry as soon as I smelled the pancakes that Esme had made — he sat me next to him on the bench in front of the piano, and played for me for well over an hour. There were some pieces I knew and others that were new to me. When I asked him about them he said that it was his music.

There was one piece that made my heart clench in my chest because it was so sad. It was one of his. "Why is it so sad?" I asked.

"I wrote it a week after our night together. I couldn't find you, and I felt lost."

And this time I _was_ crying. I didn't like to think of him being this hurt, didn't want him to ever feel like that again.

"Shh… don't cry. I have you now. I've found the woman of my dreams and I'm not letting you go again."

"I won't let you leave either. Just giving you a fair warning."

"Good." He smiled and kissed me lightly.

**~.~.~**

Edward never left my side throughout that weekend. The only time we parted was at night. It was still too soon for that, and I was too embarrassed anyway with his parents present. When we got back to Seattle, Edward met me every day after my classes and we spend the rest of the day together until it was time to sleep.

He came with me to my next checkup, and he cried with me when we heard — for the very first time — the heartbeat of our baby. Edward wanted to know the sex, so he walked outside to talk to Dr. Grace, while I cleaned up and got down from the table.

"That is one fine young man you have there," Dr. Grace told me as we were leaving.

"I know." I smiled and looked at Edward, my heart swelling with emotions.

_How was it possible to feel so strongly about him, so soon?_

I had no doubt that I loved him. I realized it a few night ago when we said goodbye and I felt a tug in my heart. Watching him leave every night was getting harder and harder, almost physically painful. Alice noticed almost as soon as I did.

"You love him." It wasn't a question.

"I do."

"Did you tell him?"

"It's too soon."

"I don't think so." After a few minutes of silence she added, "He loves you too, you know."

"How do you know?"

"He has that look in his eyes whenever he looks at you or speaks about you."

"He never said anything," I whispered.

"Maybe he thinks it's too soon, too?"

She was making sense, but I still wasn't sure how to approach the subject. I decided to leave it aside for a while, not wanting to bring more complications to a situation that was already very complex.

Edward was on cloud nine after my checkup. He didn't say a word all the way back to my apartment, and I would have worried if I didn't see the wide smile he was wearing. There was no doubt in my mind that he was happy about our baby, no doubt that he wanted him or her, but there was this annoying voice in the back of my mind, asking me — _does he want you as well? Is he happy because of the baby or because of you_.

It was stupid to listen to that voice, but as the days passed and Edward didn't say those three little words, I began to feel that voice getting stronger. We still saw each other almost every day, and while I was busy with classes, Edward was recording. He had moved away from the house he rented with James, and was now living in an apartment closer to downtown Seattle. He had a small piano in that apartment, and on some days, he would work on his music while I sat not far from him and read a book or listened to him play. Usually we didn't need words to communicate, but I couldn't shake that damned little devil on my shoulder that was filling me with doubts.

My pregnancy was no longer secret. With a five-month belly, it was a little hard to hide, and there was no reason to do so. We didn't flash it, but if someone asked, Edward confirmed with a proud smile, almost challenging the person to say anything. Charlie was also happy to hear that I had found the father of my baby, but the fact that he was happy I found Edward and told him about the baby didn't mean that Charlie didn't try to give Edward a lecture when we went to meet him one weekend. One might have thought I was pregnant and barefoot by the way my dad was talking!

"She was the one who left him, Charlie. Stop grilling the kid," Sue chided him at some point, beating me to the punch by mere seconds.

Charlie grumbled but dropped the subject.

As suspected, I became the talk of the town in Forks. Unwed mother-to-be who was seeing the baby's father — a Cullen no less — was too juicy to pass. Sometimes the town's gossip made me truly sick. Edward was much better than me with handling the gossip, and it felt good to have him by my side.

In the middle of April, I felt my baby move for the first time. It was almost like a tickle, only from the inside of my belly. I was terribly ticklish, and after a few minutes of sitting on Edward's couch while he was playing, I couldn't stop the giggles from escaping me any longer.

"Bella?" Edward stopped playing at looked at me. "What's so funny?"

I shook my head, holding my hand over my mouth as giggles spilled from me. I changed position, sitting up on the couch, and the tickling stopped for a moment, only to begin again before I was able to catch my breath. I rubbed my belly and stood up, walking over to Edward.

"The baby's kicking and it tickles." I giggled.

Edward's eyes lit up immediately and he placed his hand over my stomach, but the movements were still too light for him to feel anything.

"I can't feel anything." He pouted and I decided that the 'Alice pout' was definitely a family trait.

"It's too subtle right now, but you should be able to feel him in a few weeks or so."

Edward placed both his hands over my tummy and whispered something I couldn't hear.

"What are you doing?"

"I was just telling the baby how much he's loved, how much I can't wait to have him here with us, and how much I love his mother." His eyes sparked with an emotion I could finally name. Love.

"I love you, Edward," I said, touched to the core by every word he spoke.

"I love you, Bella." He stood up and hugged me.

I nuzzled my face in the crook of his neck and he held me tightly to him.

* * *

**A/N: ****The tickling part is absolutely true. When my friend - who's ticklish like hell - was pregnant and her daughter was kicking her (in the early stages of pregnancy), my friend would laugh non-stop because she said it felt like being tickled from the inside.**

**Thank you for reading,**

**Alley Cat.**


	4. Birthday

**A/N: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight.  
**

* * *

**Chapter 4 – Birthday**

A day before Edward's twenty-fifth birthday, I entered my seventh month of pregnancy, and all hell broke loose. I felt like a whale washed to the beach. My back hurt. My legs hurt. I felt too hot even in the relatively cool weather of June, and everything irritated me, including the most annoying thing of all — I couldn't see my own feet anymore!

When Alice pointed out that I was wearing a different colored sock on each leg, I snapped at her as well. She had tears in her eyes, and left the apartment two minutes later.

"I'm just a horrible, fat whale!" I cried into the empty room.

I kept on sobbing, drowning in self-pity. I just hurt my best friend in the world. My boyfriend and the father of my baby had a birthday the next day and I didn't even get him a present and all I could do was sit in the middle of my living room and cry.

_Pathetic!_

"Don't cry, baby, please." Edward's arms were suddenly around me, and he was trying to sooth me. I didn't even notice him coming in. "I can't see you cry, my angel. Please, tell me what's wrong so I can fix it."

"You can't fix it!" I wailed. "I'm already pregnant! You can't make me un-pregnant!"

Edward chuckled.

"Why are you laughing at me?" I yelled, going from sadness to anger in a split second. "This is all your fault! I hate you!"

"I'm not laughing at you, sweetie." He wiped away my tears. "It was just what you said that was funny to me."

"So now you're making fun of me?" I screeched.

"No! Of course not! You know that I'll never do that."

"I don't know anything anymore," I mumbled.

He tried to hold me again but I pushed him away. I didn't want anyone touching me. I didn't want anything. It was stupid, but more than anything, I wanted my mother to be here with me, and I couldn't have that. Worse, my mother died thinking that I hated her. What kind of a daughter was I to do such a thing? What kind of a mother could I be?

Edward tried to sooth me again, rubbing my back in circles, but I didn't want him to sooth me, I didn't deserve it. I was a terrible person.

"Don't touch me."

I pushed him away and stood up. It wasn't easy, my sense of balance was never good and the added weight to the front of my body made it even harder, but I've managed to do that without his help.

"Just leave me alone," I whispered through my tears and walked away to my bedroom.

I didn't deserve to have him. I didn't deserve to have Alice as my best friend.

I went to my bedroom, lay down on my bed, pushed my head into a pillow, and cried my heart out. I didn't even know why I was crying anymore, but I just couldn't stop. I felt angry and sad, and at the same time, hurt and lonely, too.

And still, I was pushing everyone away.

"I'm not making any sense," I murmured to myself.

"No you're not making any sense. Now how about you snap out of it?" The question came from Rose, standing in the doorway to my bedroom with her hands on her hips and a frown on her face.

I stared at her. The shock of her harsh tone rendered me speechless.

"What? Nothing to say? You had plenty to say to Alice and Edward earlier," she barked.

"I'm sorry. But you don't understand —"

"The hell I don't!" Rose cut me off. "You think that just because you're pregnant, you can do anything you want? Say anything you want?"

"Well, no, but —"

"But what? Do you know how much you've hurt Alice? She was crying to Jasper. Alice! Crying!" she yelled. "And Edward? You didn't see the way he looked when he walked out of this apartment! You're being a selfish bitch!"

Now I was angry, how did she dare calling me names? If anything, she was being the bitch. I was about to say just that, but she continued.

"You know nothing about being hurt! You think that it's hard being pregnant when you have the support of all your friends, your family and the father of your baby?" Her eyes were burning with anger and hurt. "How about being raped and then finding out you're pregnant with _his_ kid?"

I gasped, holding my hand over my mouth in shock.

_Raped?_

"And while you're trying to decide what to do, you have a miscarriage that almost kills you, but when the doctors save you they tell you that there is no way you could have children again. _That's_ hard!"

"I'm so sorry," I mumbled. I held my hand over my belly, cradling my baby. "I'm so sorry, Rose." I didn't know I had so many tears, but I was crying again.

"Why do you think I keep pushing Emmett away?" Rose asked through her own tears. "I can see the way he acts around you. I saw how excited he was that Edward is going to be a dad, and I know that I can't ever give him that."

I stood up and hugged her — well, as much as my big belly could allow me to hug anyone. "I'm sorry, Rose. You're right. I'm being a crybaby. I'm sorry."

Rose hugged me back. "It's not me you need to apologize to, you know."

"I know, but I'm still sorry."

We stood there, hugging each other for several moments until we both calmed down.

"There is no chance? Ever?" I looked at the beautiful face of Rose, thinking how I always thought of her as being perfect, but I never saw how much pain she was hiding under her bitchy attitude.

"They said that it was very unlikely that I could ever carry a child all through the pregnancy."

"I'm sorry."

"I know." She gave me one last hug before finally releasing me. "Now wipe away your tears, we're going to get Alice so that you can apologize to her, and then we're going to take you shopping for a birthday present for Edward."

"How did you know that I didn't get him anything?" I asked, surprised.

"I didn't, I just guessed that you didn't have to time do that." She smiled.

"Thank you, Rosalie."

"For what?"

"For giving me a much needed dose of perspective."

"You mean a kick in the butt," she corrected.

"Yeah, that too." I laughed.

**~.~.~**

Apologizing to Alice was the easy part, but apologizing to Edward was a whole different ball game. First, he didn't answer his cell phone, and second, he wasn't in his apartment. I was getting worried that something might have happened to him when Alice's phone rang.

"Hi mom, did you hear from —" Alice was cut off. After listening for a few minutes, she said, "Mom said that he showed up there about fifteen minutes ago."

I sighed in relief. He was in Forks, he wasn't hurt or mugged or hit by a car. He was safe.

Alice listened to Esme for a few more minutes. "Yeah, they sort of had a fight. Can you get him to a phone? Okay, great." She turned to me and gave me her cell phone.

I took it and waited for a few minutes while Esme put him on the phone.

"Bella, I'm sorry —"

"No, I'm the one who should be sorry." I was quick to say. "I was being a terrible bitch, and I'm so sorry. I love you." I blurted out the words as fast as I could.

"I love you too, honey. And it's okay, you have a pretty good excuse, you know."

"No, it's not okay, I was being terrible all on my own account, and I'm sorry."

"Well, I forgive you. You're feeling better, though?" I could hear the concern in his voice.

"Yes, Rose gave a good kick in the butt and Alice forgave me as well, so I'm good."

"I'm glad to hear that." He breathed, in — what I was sure was — relief. "Do you want me to come and get you?"

"No, Rose and Alice are taking me shopping, it will take us a while."

"Yeah, that sounds like Alice, all right." He chuckled.

"Let me talk to him," Alice asked from behind me.

"Wait, Alice wants to talk to you. Love you."

"Love you too."

I handed Alice the cell phone and she said, "Hold on," walking out of the living room into Jasper's bedroom to talk.

I waited with Rose in the living room while Alice talked to Edward. After about ten minutes, she came back out with a mischievous smile on her face.

"Alice?" _Why is she smiling like that?_

"It's nothing, Bella," she said, but her smile grew even wider. It could be due to something else, though, since the next thing that came out of her mouth was, "Now let's go find my brother a birthday present!"

**~.~.~**

Rose had already gotten Edward her present weeks ago — a CD collection of his favorite classics and their music sheets. Alice refused to tell us what she was getting him but said that Jasper and Emmet got him the latest model of a 3D TV with all the gadgets. I was at a complete lose as we went from one shop to another and I couldn't come up with an idea.

While I was pondering different possibilities, Alice was slowly — but surely — gathering more and more bags from different shops. She bought lingerie for herself, clothes for both her and Jasper, a new perfume which I actually liked when she asked me how it smelled, tons of scented candles in different sized, bath and body lotions, and it went on and on. Alice was the queen of shopping. But as the bags began to pile up and we made our second trip to the car just to put the bags in the baggage so we won't have to carry them around all day — I was still without an idea.

"I just don't know what to get him that he can't get for himself" I said to Rose, while Alice was picking out a tie for Jasper.."I mean, besides the obvious" I gestured at my stomach and Rose laughed.

"Well, sex is always good." She winked.

"Yeah, Like I can have sex right now!" I said as loudly as I could afford without drawing too much attention.

"Sure you can."

"Really?"

"Yes. Aren't you the one who was supposed to be the well informed?" She chuckled.

I blushed. It was one of the few subjects I didn't even think about investigating when I first learned I was pregnant. It was kind of obvious to me that it wasn't possible.

"Well, you can. And I'm sure Eddie —boy wouldn't object." She winked and I blushed even harder.

As we continued to walk around the mall Alice suddenly came to a stop next to a small shop that specialized in custom printing on almost any fabric.

"What is it Alice?" Rose asked.

"Bella, look." Alice pointed at their display, which showed two pillowcases that were placed together forming one complete picture. On one pillowcase there was a male stick-figure blowing heart-shaped bubbles towards the right and on the second pillowcase there were more bubbles and a blushing female stick-figure.

"That's perfect!" I smiled. "Isn't it a little too… direct?"

"You want to get laid anytime soon or not?" Rose asked bluntly.

"Rose!" I screeched in shock.

"Well, don't you?"

"Well… I guess…"

"Then it's perfect!" Alice chimed.

I ended up buying three pairs of pillowcases, since I couldn't decided which was better and Rose convinced me to take all three. Alice found matching white sheets and the shopkeeper wrapped it all into one present.

"Now let's go get something to eat!" I said as we walked out of the shop. "I'm starving!"

**~.~.~**

We arrived in Forks a little after nine. I took a nap before we left and during the three and half hour drive so I felt pretty refreshed. But I was in a desperate need for a shower, so when Esme said that Edward and Emmett were out and will be back in about fifteen minutes - I went straight into the guest bedroom I used whenever I was staying with the Cullens.

Alice insisted on picking out my outfit for the dinner, but after seeing that she chose a simple v-neck blue top with a pair of black maternity pants I didn't argue. I took a much needed shower and felt much better when I washed my hair and body. When I came back into the room I saw that Alice also took out a pair of matching bra and panties in the same blue color as the top, for me to wear. They were the result of another shopping trip a few weeks ago when I realized that all of my bras were too small for me and Alice had insisted that you never buy a bra without a matching pair of underwear.

Once I was dressed and my hair was dry Rose knocked on my door.

"Hey, Bella. Just letting you know that dinner will be served in twenty minutes."

"Okay, I'll be right down, just figuring out what to do with my hair."

"Would you like me to braid it for you?"

"Sure, that would be a nice change." I smiled. I usually wore my hair in a pony tail or let it hang lose down my shoulders.

She sat me on the bed and climbed behind me to do the braid and I saw her reflection in the mirror. She was a little over-dressed for a simple dinner with the family.

"I'm going out with Emmett for dinner," she explained.

"That's great. You should really give him a chance, you know."

"I think I might." She had an odd smile on her face, something between longing and happiness expressed in it.

She was done in a few minutes and I looked at the result in the mirror. I looked very different with my hair done in that way, there was something a little more mature, oddly enough.

"Thank you, Rosalie," I said, and she knew I meant more than just braiding of my hair.

"You're welcome, Bella. Have fun tonight." She gave me a wink and closed the door behind her. _What was the wink about?_

I put my hair brush in its place and put on a pair of flat sneakers before leaving my room. The house was very quiet when I got to the hallway between the bedrooms. It was also dark, the only light was over the stairway. I walked down to the first floor and saw that the living room was empty and dark, but there was a little light coming from the dining room.

When I came closer to the dining room I gasped in surprise. There were candles all over the room, the table was set with the new table cloth and napkins that Alice bought earlier today, two thin white candles and set for two. Edward stood behind one of the chairs. His hair was still wet from the shower, he wore a light blue button-down shirt with a dark blue tie.

"Will you join me for dinner?" he asked with a soft smile on his face.

I couldn't speak, I just nodded. Tears filled my eyes and throat. It was so sweet of him.

Edward pulled a chair for me, being a perfect gentleman.

"This is beautiful," I whispered. "Thank you, Edward." I looked at him and I knew my eyes were filled with tears of happiness.

"You're very welcome." He smiled fully. "I hope you'll enjoy the food as much as you enjoyed the surprise." He brought two bowls.

"What is it?" I asked, looking at the orange color of the soup.

"It's Carrots, sweet potatoes and pumpkin soup. Very healthy."

"It's also delicious," I said after tasting it.

"Thank you."

"You cooked?"

"You don't have to be so surprised." He smiled. "I cooked for you before."

"I wasn't surprised you cooked." I blushed. "I guess I didn't think you had enough time. Esme said you were out when we arrived."

"I made most of the preparations before we left, and the soup doesn't take too long."

"So where did you go?"

He hesitated. "To Port Angeles, with Emmett."

There was more to the story, I could feel it, but I didn't press the matter. Edward had a right to privacy.

The next course was plain white rice with sliced fried beef and some kind of Asian gravy on it. Just like the soup — it was also very good. When Edward said there was also dessert I said that I couldn't possibly eat anything more.

"It's a small one, and we'll share," he insisted, sending me a much-too-persuasive smile.

"All right." I took a sip from my glass. At first when Edward poured the bubbly drink I thought it was champagne, because of the color and the bubble, but it turned out as sparkling apple cider — nothing alcoholic.

Edward came back carrying one plate with three scoops of ice cream and two spoons.

"I can never say no to ice cream." I sighed. "But you will have to help me," I warned him.

"I intend to."

Even though he brought two spoons he insisted on feeding me the ice cream himself, and I ended up eating the larger portion.

"I'm stuffed," I said when we were done, placing my hands over my stomach.

"I'll be right back, don't move." He stood up and took the dirty dishes from the table.

I heard the water run and then what sounded like the opening and closing of the dishwasher. It took him several minutes and I guess that he was making sure not to leave dishes for Esme to find when she comes back home. He said during dinner that everyone left the house, Alice and Jasper went over to have dinner with his parents, Emmett took Rose a romantic dinner of his own and Carlisle and Esme invited Charlie and Sue for dinner in Port Angeles.

We had the house for ourselves.

_We can make as much noise as we want_… the thought brought a wave of blush to my cheeks. It was really Rose's fault, she was the one who brought up the sex issue when we were shopping and now I couldn't get that out of my head. Edward and I haven't… been intimate, ever since that night in December. The memories I had from that night were only fuelling my already-active libido.

I looked up when Edward came back into the room. He seemed nervous as he sat next to me and took my left hand in his, leaving my right resting over my belly.

"Bella, I have been looking for someone who could make me feel the way you do, all of my life."

My heartbeat picked up pace with each word coming out of his mouth.

"I didn't even know your name the first time we made love, but when I woke up in the morning and you weren't there I felt as though a part of my heart was missing. I lost you before I had a chance to know you." He took a deep breath, steadying his voice. "I was delighted to find you again, especially when I learned that you were about to give me the most precious gift possible." He placed one hand over my belly, right next to mine. "A baby, a child of my own."

I covered his hand with mine and we both felt the baby kick.

"This morning I was afraid I had lost you again." His voice broke and he had to take another deep breath. "I came here half crazy and it took Esme quite a while to calm me down and convince me that it was the hormones talking and not you."

"She was right," I said quietly.

"I know." He smiled again and stood up, taking his hand back and taking something out of his pocket, "But I've realized that you're too important to me, I don't want us to be apart anymore." I gasped as he kneeled in front of me and opened the small black box he was holding in his hand. "Bella, my love, you brought the warmth back into my life when I didn't even realize I was freezing, you make me smile even before I wake up in the morning and you are the last thought before I fall asleep. I want to spend every day of the rest of my live with you, will you marry me?"

I didn't even see the ring, I was looking into his eyes and seeing his love for me reflect in them. "Yes," I whispered. He took the ring out of the box and slid it on my finger. "A perfect fit," he murmured and kissed my hand before standing up and pulling me for a hug. "Thank you for making me the happiest man in the world."

**~.~.~**

Edward took me to his room that night, insisting that he didn't want to spend another night away from me. We made love before falling asleep, he was so gentle that I felt the urge to cry. He kissed and caressed every part of my body, brining me to one climax after the other, before finally joining our bodies and allowing himself to release as well. As we were falling asleep, Edward spooning me with his hand over my belly, the baby decided that it was a great time to have a work out.

I groaned.

"I think we woke him up." Edward chuckled.

"I think so." I yawned. "Well, you woke him up, you need to find a way to put him back to sleep." I teased.

"Well, how about I sing for you, think it will calm him down?"

I loved to hear Edward sing, he had a smooth Baritone voice and when he sang I could feel my body turn into jelly. "I know that it makes me all warm and fuzzy, so it's worth a shot." I giggled.

"Warm and fuzzy, eh?" he chuckled, "Well, what would you like me to sing?"

"Do you know any lullabies?" I looked at him raising a brow in a challenge.

"Of course I do, but I have a better idea," he said as he perched himself on his elbow, leaning closer to whisper in my ear. "It's a lullaby I wrote for you, it doesn't have words yet, but I think you'll like it just as well."

"I'm sure I'd love it. I love everything you write."

"All right, you're comfortable?"

"Yup."

And then he began to hum. It was a very sweet melody, calm and harmonic. The baby was calming down within minutes and I drifted to a sleep filled with dreams about rainbows and Edward.

**Two months later…**

"Push, Bella!" Edward encouraged me as another contraction hit me. I was tired and sweaty and it hurt_, oh my god how it hurts!_, but I did my best to push.

I was pushing for so long I could no longer tell what time it was. There was only the pain.

"Come on, my love, you can do this," Edward murmured in my ear, holding my hand tightly and wiping the sweat away from my forehead.

"It hurts so much," I whimpered.

"I know, baby, just a little more," he kept murmuring in my ear, but I couldn't separate the sounds into words anymore as another contraction sent even more pain through my body.

I could hear them telling me to push and I tried, I really tried but I couldn't do this anymore. I closed my eyes for just a moment but I couldn't find the strength to open them again. After a few more seconds there was no more pain, just darkness. I felt as though my body was drifting, away from the hospital bed and from the pain. I wanted to sigh in relief but no sound came from me.

There was something bright coming to me and I heard voices again, but none of those voices was Edward's. As the light grew closer I recognized the voice of my grandmother.

"Hello my Bella," she said with a wide smile on her face. "You've grown so much."

"Grandma?" I whispered, _how could this be?_

"There is someone here who wants to meet you." She pointed behind me.

I turn and gasped. My mother and Phil were standing behind me. They were wearing something white that I couldn't quite make put the shape of.

"Mom… Phil…" I whispered.

"Bella, I have missed you so much." My mother hugged me tightly.

"I've missed you too, so much," I cried. "I love you, mom," I said quickly, afraid that she would disappear before I get the words out of my mouth. "I didn't mean what I said that day."

"I know, sweetie. I never doubted that," she said as she released me.

"I'm so sorry."

"Don't be, I knew that you were only mad at me, and you were right to." My mother pushed a strand of hair behind my ear, much like she used to do all those years ago. "You've grown to become a lovely woman, and you're about to become a mother yourself. I'm so proud of you."

"My baby!" I cried, placing a hand over my stomach, it was flat and I panicked. "I need to go back."

"Yes you do," My mom said softly. "We don't have much time, sweetie. You need to go back."

I nodded.

"It's not your time yet, but I'll be waiting for you when it is." Her image began to fade as she spoke, "Edward is a wonderful man, take care of him and of my granddaughter. I know you'll be a wonderful mother." And then she disappeared.

I felt myself sinking back into the darkness and the numbness returning to my body. There was no more pain, no more voices, just this empty darkness. I struggled to find the strength to feel my body again.

"Bella, love, don't leave me." I could hear Edward's voice again, pleading me. "Bella stay with me, please," he begged and it sounded like he was crying.

_Why was he crying?_

"Bella, I know you can hear me, please, keep fighting, I can't live without you."

_Of course I can hear you, Edward. I can't live without you either_.

The numbness slowly went away and the pain came back. I welcomed the pain this time, it was proof that my daughter was trying to come into the world. I needed to be strong for her, for Edward. I felt another contraction and I pushed.

I pushed harder than ever, harder than I thought possible.

"That's it, my love. I need you to open your eyes for me. I need to see you, my love."

I couldn't do that, I was too busy pushing and breathing with the next contraction.

"Isabella, you're doing great, just one more push," the doctor said.

I screamed as the next contraction was the most painful of them all. I screamed and I pushed and my eyes flew open to see Edward's green eyes filled with tears looking at me.

"I love you, Edward," I mouthed.

"I love you, Bella." He sighed in relief. "Thank you for coming back to me."

A moment later, I heard the best sound in my life — my daughter's first cry — and I started crying myself.

Edward cut her umbilical cord before she was taken for a weighing.

**~.~.~**

"I thought I lost you today," Edward whispered as I held our daughter in my arms for the first time. She was so tiny.

"I will never leave you, Edward. I had to come back to you."

"I'm grateful you did."

After a few moments of silence, I spoke again. "She has your hair."

"But she has your nose," he teased, pressing a finger to my nose.

"She's perfect."

"Just like her mother."

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**A/N: ********The pillowcases are actual gift that you can find online, I posted the links on my profile as well as a link to a picture of Bella's top.**

**Thank you for reading,**

**Alley Cat.**


	5. Epilogue

**A/N: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight.  
**

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**Epilogue**

December was no longer the worst time of year for me. So much had changed in the past three years that it turned this once most hated time of year to one of my most favorite.

On December three years ago, I met the love of my life and we both created the most important person in both of our lives — our daughter, Elizabeth Rene Cullen, named after both of her grandmothers.

On December two years ago, I married Edward in a small and private ceremony, in the same church where my parents married in when they were eighteen. It was just a few hours before Emmett proposed to Rose during our reception, which turned into an impromptu engagement party.

On December last year, just as we all gathered in my and Edward's new home in Forks — neither one of us wanted to live too far from our parents — Rose broke the most wonderful news to us; she was three months pregnant. With Twins!

It was once again December. The snow covered the city in a coat of white, and we gathered in Rose and Emmet's house in Seattle, since it was the only house large enough to hold all of us. It was nice to have everyone there: Edward, me, and Beth; Rose, Emmett, and the twins — Lilly and Emmett Jr.; Esme and Carlisle; Charlie and Sue; Jasper, and even Alice, who insisted on coming even though she just gave birth to their son, Michael, two weeks ago.

"Our family is growing," I heard Esme whisper, wrapped in Carlisle's arms.

"It definitely is," he murmured in return.

The kids were opening their presents — mostly with the help of their parents as all of them, with the exception of Beth, were too young to do it themselves.

"She's so beautiful," Edward said.

We were both watching our little girl as she opened Carlisle's present — a doctor's play set. I smiled. Carlisle was hoping that at least one of his grandkids would follow his footsteps as neither of his children had any interest in medicine.

"Yes, she is. I have one more gift to you."

"What is it, love?" He looked at me with surprise in his eyes.

All of the adults had already opened their presents the night before, after the kids all went to bed.

"It's still wrapped and it will take a while until you can actually get it…" I trailed off with a smile, bringing his hand over my still-flat stomach. I watched his eyes widen as the pieces fell together.

"Are you sure?"

"The doctor confirmed it two days ago."

Edward swept me in his arms and spun me around. He had a huge smile all over his face. I smiled back.

December was the best time of year.

**The End.**

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**A/N: I hope you enjoyed the story. Loads of fluff, just as promised :)**

**Thank you for reading, please take a moment and leave me a review tell me what you thought about the story.  
**

**Alley Cat.**


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